Working From Home

 

The motto every woman should repeat

(in the age of “Lean In”?)

Good for her! Not for me.

Amy Pohler

The all American preoccupation with achievement makes the question “Do you work?” ubiquitous and I catch myself cringing even before I hear a stay-at-home mother reply with an apologetic “No,” grappling to enumerate what keeps her days busy.

While a mother may not get a paycheck for all the invisible work she does to keep hearth and home together, she most definitely works plenty both day and many sleepless nights!  A mother’s work deserves proper recognition and respect–this is why I teach my sons that when the time comes, they must pay their wives if these women chooses to keep their careers on hold to raise their children. She is not a teen entitled only to an allowance. She should always have money she can call her own, not just access to a conjugal bank account audited by the spouse.  When you marry a good woman, she is worth her weight in gold for the myriad services that simply gets chalked up to love. Enough! Even the cleaning lady who breezes through my house has the sense to demand more than triple the hourly minimum wage!

For those who are savvy enough to create meaningful work off their kitchen table, Kathleen Murray Harris shares How To Win At Working From Home (Real Simple, October 2017):

Stick to a schedule and dress up for official business. There will never be an end to the world’s demands of us so set work hours that include breaks and a designated stop time. “When you have a structure, you become more efficient,” says Julie Morgenstern, an organizing expert and the author of “Organizing from the Inside Out.”  Chores you need done for the house or family must be pencilled in your calendar like any other work appointment or, better yet, delegate!

Make your work space inviting. Wireless makes working anywhere possible (and I constantly struggle with the call of the couch and bed!) Maintain an office space in a corner or separate room. Keep it tidy with minimal distractions. Turn off phones and social media on your computer background screen.

Get help.  “Don’t kid yourself and think you don’t need a babysitter for young children if you’re working at home,” says Maura Thomas, a productivity expert and author of Work Without Walls. With the husband and kids who are old enough to understand, put a sign outside a closed door to let them know when “you’ll be back” and a whiteboard where they can write what they need to remember to bring up with you later.

Have an end of work day ritual. Without a commute to wind down and switch gears as career woman and mom/wife. create your own transitions routine: Check what you’ve accomplished on your To Do List and create a new one for the next day. Change clothes to change your mindset and take a brief walk to reconnect with nature, allowing the change of scenery to clear your head.

Now if only my teens would try these ideas out on their school work themselves. Sigh!

Click on “Leave a Comment” (top left) to share your work from home success secrets.

xoxox

 

 

 

Give the women you love the most unique gift

of elegant and timeless portraits

with  a Powerful Goddess photo shoot Gift Certificate:

Buy Now Button with Credit Cards

© Sharon Birke

Managing Member, DoubleSmart LLC

201 697 1947

Sharon@PowerfulGoddess.com

www.PowerfulGoddess.com

Glamour Portraits of the Goddess in Every Woman

 

Coming Of Age

 

Being an adult is mostly just

going to bed when you don’t want to

and also getting up when you don’t want to.

Pinterest

 

Happy Back to School Whew!  Grateful to send two sons off to colleges (albeit in opposite directions) and now wondering how to sell a tighter driving radius to my daughter for her own university prospects.  Not that I’ll insist she visits me often–though that can’t possibly be such a bad thing, no?

From Anne Morrow Lindbergh’s Gift From The Sea:

Woman must come of age by herself.  This is the essence of “coming of age”–to learn how to stand alone. She must learn not to depend on another, nor to feel she must prove her strength by competing with another. In the past, she has swung between these two opposite poles of dependent and competition, of Victorianism and Feminism. Both extremes throw her off balance, neither is the center, the true center of being a whole woman. She must become whole. She must, it seems to me, as a prelude to an “two solitudes” relationship, follow the advice of the poet to become “world to oneself for another’s sake.”

In fact, I wonder if both man and woman must not accomplish this heroic feat. Most not man also become world to himself? Must he not also expand the neglected sides of his personality, the art of inward looking that he has seldom had time for in his active outward-going life, the personal relationships which he has not had as much chance to enjoy, the so-called feminine qualities, aesthetic, emotional, cultural and spiritual, which he has been too rushed to fully develop. Perhaps both men and woman in America may hunger, in our material outward, active, masculine culture, for the supposedly feminine qualities of heart, mind and spirit–qualities which are actually nighter masculine not feminine, but simply human qualities that have been neglected.  It is growth along these lines that will make us whole, and will enable the individual to become world to himself.

Click on “Leave a Comment” (top left) to share how being a world unto yourself has meant for you.

xoxox

 

 

 

 

 

xoxox

Give the women you love the most unique gift

of elegant and timeless portraits

with  a Powerful Goddess portrait session Gift Certificate:

Buy Now Button with Credit Cards

© Sharon Birke

Managing Member, DoubleSmart LLC

201 697 1947

Sharon@PowerfulGoddess.com

www.PowerfulGoddess.com

Glamour Portraits of the Goddess in Every Woman

Ala Anna Karenina

My mother never breastfed me–

she said she only

liked me as a friend.

Rodney Dangerfield

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While I admire Anna Karenina’s fashion sense, I stand on the opposite side of the tracks in my belief that there is absolutely no man worth dying for. But for a daughter who is joy and beauty inside and out? Let’s talk…

This Powerful Goddess dedicates her portraits to her mom and best friend, the woman who chose 8 months of bed rest when doctors foretold that with her advanced age and history of miscarriage, she would never carry a baby to term. Certainly not the first (nor last) underestimation of a woman’s courage to choose life, yes?

In this Anna Karenina inspired concept to honor her Russian heritage, this Powerful Goddess proudly wears her mother’s green eyes and a touch of her Asian features.  With her mother’s elegant hands, she writes, “My mom taught me to be kind, honest, and caring, to value life and family above all. I never keep secrets from her knowing that she doesn’t judge and will always be supportive. She gave me the ability to see beauty wherever I go. I admire her tenderness and strength, her wisdom, and her naiveté in loving fully and giving generously. I owe her my life and so much more. I love, you, Mama!”

Sniff, sniff! May all our daughters be as appreciative of us…

Click on “Leave a Comment” to share what you love best about the woman who chose life for you.

Happiest Mother’s Day to all and the Happiest Birthday Ever to my gorgeous Anna Karenina!

xoxox

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Give the women you love the most unique gift of elegant and timeless portraits

with a Powerful Goddess portrait session Gift Certificate:

Buy Now Button with Credit Cards

 © Sharon Birke

201 697 1947

Sharon@PowerfulGoddess.com

www.PowerfulGoddess.com

Glamour Portraits of the Goddess in Every Wife & Mother

Makeup and Make Not

My mother’s idea of

natural childbirth was

giving birth without makeup.

Robin Williams

Comedy Central’s Amy Schumer parodies our beauty standards in this video “Girl, You Don’t Need Makeup.” We’re in on the joke if we admit how compulsively we submit to the judgment of others, particularly to the itinerant male gaze.

“You look better without makeup,” my husband used to tell me as a young bride and I’d stare back at him incredulously. I was blind to his point of view so his compliment bordered on ludicrous.

Having been raised with Western beauty as the ideal, my small eyes were the biggest thing I wished I weren’t born with. Kids with “normal” eyes teased, “Do you see half as much as we do?” My grandmother offered the best use of my first paycheck, “You should have slits done on your eyelids!” Too chicken for a cosmetic procedure my paycheck could not have covered anyhow, I piled on five layers of eye shadow each morning in a futile attempt to make my eyes look wider, bigger, less Asian. Several women in our family wore a similar patch of black eyeliner on the eyelids, mimicking that fold of skin our slanted eyes forgot to have. For most of my youth, no force on earth could have convinced me that almond eyes are beautiful.

Then my kids started rolling in. The second child was enough to make me feel sufficiently outnumbered and spread thin. Only two hands to get two kids dressed, fed and rushed to school? Something had to give! I lay down those makeup brushes in surrender.

Sixteen years later, it is now a mystery how I thought starting the day with heavy makeup was a bright idea. With three teens testing parental boundaries, small eyes see enough for me to handle. And will I swear off makeup completely?  Not likely! What’s the point (and the fun) of being a woman if we didn’t have options, my dear–and plenty of them!

In behalf of those who eschew makeup because they can, this Powerful Goddess glamorously bares it.  She is of that rare breed who firmly believes she is most beautiful without it.  Why, even the blind can see that! Ah-men.

Click on “Leave a Comment” to share how you honor your natural beauty. xoxox

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Give the women you love the most unique gift of elegant and timeless portraits

with a Powerful Goddess portrait session Gift Certificate:

Buy Now Button with Credit Cards

xoxox

 © Sharon Birke

201 697 1947

Sharon@PowerfulGoddess.com

www.PowerfulGoddess.com

Glamour Portraits of the Goddess in Every Wife & Mother

Giants and Other Winners

If at first you don’t succeed, find out if the loser gets anything.

Bill Lyon

My neighbors’ kids got her hooked on football this year.  Sunday’s Superbowl sealed her conversion to the sport and their family took the day off from school to witness the NY Giants parade down Manhattan.  They dove into an ocean of blue shirts, ducking streams of white paper rolls tossed about like footballs, amazed at the fervor of adoring fans who reveled in their heroes’ success as if they had played the game themselves.

With the lure of big checks, diamond rings, and celebrity perks, it is easy to forget that there could be more to gain from our disappointments and frustrations–if we choose to see them as steppingstones for learning and growth.   Many lose a good night’s sleep fretting over their fumbles, missed passes and Hail Mary’s that went unheard by the gods.  Unsung heroes like my neighbor wonder, “What about MY parade?”

 How can you give yourself a parade for showing up in the game of life?

© Sharon Birke

www.PowerfulGoddess.com

Photography for the Goddess in Every Wife & Mother

Powerful Goddess is a trademark of DoubleSmart LLC

xoxox

To Baby or Not to Baby


Simply having children

does not make mothers.

John A. Shedd

Would you believe this photo series is the celebration of a Goddess who turned 43?  She wishes looking a decade younger could silence the deafening tick tock of her biological clock and the nosy nags at family gatherings.  Elusive Mr. Right continues to hold hostage the children she may never have–despite the parade of Mr. Right Nows who volunteer to be sperm donors.

Friends, celebrities, and experts provide a mixed bag of social proof on the matter of her biological imperative.  She’s heard the cynical declare “Having kids is overrated!”  She has witnessed older friends regret not having kids, single mothers who juggle an act for two, women who snob adoption for the pain of freezing eggs (aka, hope) or fertility treatments at a king’s ransom.  Some unwittingly bind themselves to a lifetime of indentured parenthood with offspring who are forever dependent whether by illness or lack of ambition.  She’s seen women agonize over the destiny of their yet unfertilized eggs while others plop kids out without a thought.  Some consider kids as social security in their old age.  Others acquire them as the  latest luxury “must have.”  There are those who would fare better taking a parenting license exam not just driver’s ed.  And how can she not admire women who truly enjoy the thankless role of mothering? — That mythical ideal both inspiration and curse to the many of us who can’t measure up.

Childless or not, what moves you to have children?

© Sharon Birke

201 697 1947

www.PowerfulGoddess.com

Photography for the Goddess in Every Wife & Mother

Powerful Goddess is a trademark of DoubleSmart LLC

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