Alone Need Not Be Lonely

 

Your child’s life will

be filled with fresh experiences.

It’s good if yours is as well.

Dr. Margaret Rutherford

 

 

Happy new school year and Hurray for Empty Nest!  While our young wannabe adults are happily settled in their respective college dorms, I am skipping around the house, thrilled to have it all to myself at last. No more waking to other people’s alarms, slamming doors or heavy footfall. No mess in the kitchen sink that isn’t mine.  No one else’s junk spilling out of one less cupboard. The only thing I miss is a compelling answer to that question well-meaning friends and family never tire of asking: What next?  Why–Do they imagine being stripped off the mantel of mothering depressing? That I’d mourn its relentless martyrdom?  Rush to fill the void of being needed?  Au contraire!  I am quite content admiring the empty spaces in my internal and physical landscape, reveling in the freedom of a blank slate, stillness and quiet. I feel so much excitement bubbling over no specific reason. It is an exhilaration not unlike  jailbreak!

Aaah, that blank canvas–it is intimidating even as it promises much possibility.  In this culture of relentless achievement, how can I possibly look people in the eye and admit I do not have a grand plan?  Yet, yet my heart feels full and so very excited over what appears to be absolutely nothing.  I take pleasure in this time to embrace and circle back to the self I have ignored for too long in the service of family. I am seduced by the attention I can give to the woman whose voice has been drowned out by everyone else’s wants and schedules at work and at home.  This could be a scary chapter indeed. What if that blank canvas remains just that?  At least, I am cushioned by the confidence that I have been in this familiar place of new beginnings many times before. Since then, I have acquired riches over the years in wealth and clarity about what makes me happy or not.  I can choose to narrow options or expand creatively, seeing the old with new eyes.

As unread books on the shelf wink at me complicity and travel adventures beckon, I dream of new crafts awaiting to be learned, beautiful objects to be found in cultures and traditions that I’ve taken for granted.  I may yet learn Mandarin, find the patience to paint like a renaissance master, write that darn book that stubbornly refuses to write itself. Who knows what doors I’ll open or what doors I’ll build if opportunity doesn’t knock?  Great expectations include plotting my escape from cooking for two (without resorting to divorce,) going back to college for the sheer joy of learning, and why not a gap year from all adult responsibility?!

Click on “Leave a Comment” (top left) to share what a blank canvas means to you.

xoxox

 

 

 

 

 

 

xoxox

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© Sharon Birke

Managing Member, DoubleSmart LLC

201 697 1947

Sharon@PowerfulGoddess.com

www.PowerfulGoddess.com

Glamour Portraits of the Goddess in Every Woman

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

When in Rome… Best Photo Locations

 

Best Instagrammable locations in Rome

Piazza Navona

My favorite piazza for its sculptures in the fountains and nightlife of hawkers and street artists. This is the neighborhood I find most central for booking a hotel so I can walk every which direction.

The Tiber River at dusk

The views along the rivers of most major cities are impressive. Rome is no exception, and the river Tiber offers photographers a number of good photographic options.
There are lots of points along this river that you could use. Here are three of the most popular choices.

  • The view to St Peter’s Basilica – The view down to St Peter’s from Ponte Sant’Angelo is one of the best in Rome. Certainly the best along the river Tiber. Aim for sunset and blue hour to make the best of this location.
  • Castel Sant’Angelo – Looking along the same bridge, Ponte Sant’Angelo, is Castel Sant’Angelo. The lines of the bridge leading up to the Castel offer another great photo from this location.
  • Street photography – It’s always good to practice some street photography, as this will enhance your Rome photography portfolio. The areas around the river bank offer good opportunities for this, with street artists going about their day.

Altare de la Patria (aka Vittorio Emmanuel monument or The Typewriter Building)

The Altare della Patria (Altar of the Fatherland) is an immense structure with striking architecture. It’s great to photograph, and offers the chance to do some cityscape work.
The proximity to busy roads will also give you the chance to juxtapose modern traffic light trails against an old traditional building.
As it’s located just in front of the Roman forum it will often be very crowded. That means arriving early in the morning if you want to photograph this building with less people wandering around.
It’s good to photograph up close to get some architectural detail photos. Another location is from Piazza Venezia, from where you can use the rule of thirds to compose a nice photo of the Altar.
Best time to visit – Early in the morning, or perhaps blue hour in the evening.

Spanish Steps

Always crowded with tourists because it’s iconic and gets featured in popular movies set in Rome.

The Colosseum

Of the New7Wonders of the World, the only one to be found in Europe is in Rome, and it’s the Colosseum.
There are plenty of good options for photographing this masterpiece, so let’s look at some of the potential photographs you could take.

  • The wider scene – Capturing the Colosseum from a vantage point is possible from the area just in front of the building. Use a wide angle lens to capture the building from an elevation.
  • Traffic trail long exposure – At street level it’s possible to capture bus light trails and the Colosseum in the same image. You won’t see cars drive past the front of this building. If you wait patiently for buses, these provide excellent light streams.
  • Detail photos – Photos of the side of the building and its architecture work very well. Use the evening sunshine to get a nice warm glow as you photograph the window arches of the Colosseum.
  • Wide angle from inside – There are several view platforms inside the Coloseum that will give you a nice view. Once again a wide angle lens is best.
  • Dawn – Arriving at dawn means being able to photograph the Colosseum with no people. You’ll also be able to capture the sun peaking through the windows of the Colosseum, as the sun is low to the horizon.

Best time to visitSunrise or blue hour.

Trevi Fountain

The Trevi fountain was completed in 1762, and today stands as one of Rome’s most popular tourist attractions. It’s not as popular as the Colosseum, or the Vatican, but still attracts large crowds.
The statues of the fountain make excellent backdrops for portrait photos. This is not lost on the throngs of people take photos of themselves and each other at this photo spot.
As a photographer you have two options, to embrace those crowds, or try to avoid them.

  • Include the crowds – Crowds can provide an important narrative element to a photo, giving the image context and life. To get the best of crowds in a photo you’ll want to get above them.
  • Avoid the crowds – There are two main ways to increase your chances of photographing a monument without the crowds. The first is to wake up early in the morning, the second is to travel during the low season.

Best time to visit – Early in the morning, before the crowds.

 

The Pantheon

In the centre of Rome is the Pantheon, yet another iconic building in Rome which you’ll want to photograph. It’s a building that’s equally nice to photograph from the exterior and the interior.
One of the best times to photograph the building from the outside is the blue hour. It will be lit up, and you’ll have the blue skies to contrast against the yellow glow of the illumination of the Pantheon.
The issue is avoiding the crowds once again. You might opt for the morning blue hour, before sunrise. The other choice is to use post processing to remove people.
The interior also presents good photos in the form of the roof of the pantheon, and the various statues you can find inside the building.
Best time to visit – The blue hour.

Piazza del Popolo

For a vantage point above street level, head towards the back of the Piazza where you can climb some steps that lead to a lookout point. Take a photo of the Piazza extending down through Rome with the dome of St Peter’s basilica in the background.

Best time to visit – Sunset and the evening twilight hour when the sky is that rich blue after sunset.

St. Peter’s Basilica

The other part of the Vatican that’s popular to visit is St Peter’s Basilica, with Piazza San Pietro right in front of it. This is an area of the Vatican that’s not walled off, so you can freely wander in here.
If you’re lucky, you might see the Pope. Should you be there on such a day bring a long telephoto lens with you. You’ll not get close enough to photograph the Pope without it.
Beyond photographing the Pope there are two main reasons you’d want to photograph at St Peter’s Basilica.

  • Church architecture – Architecture in religious building is meant to impress. That’s certainly the case at St Peter’s. So get that wide angle lens out, and do some interior architecture photography.
  • The viewpoint – This is a great place to visit for your Rome photography, with a nice view over the city.

Best time to visit – At sunrise if you want the courtyard empty.

The Vatican Staircase

The Vatican staircase is going to be one of your main Rome photography targets. It’s beautiful to photograph from the top looking down, from the bottom looking up, and midway along.
It’s also crowded with people, and they don’t really add to the photo. There is the option of arriving early, the problem is other people may arrive early as well. That’s because the queues to get in are often very long indeed, giving regular tourists the motivation to arrive early as well.
So what are the other options? The answer is layering, and using this to remove the people.

Removing People From a Scene

The following is used to take the classic photo of these stairs, from the top looking down.

  • Compose your photo, you’ll want to go as wide as you can to capture those swirling stairs.
  • Make sure you’re nice and steady, and can hold your position for the duration of the photo sequence.
  • Take a series of photos, you’ll likely need at least 20. Take a burst of 5 or 6 photos as the crowds move down the staircase, wait a while and then take another burst of photos.
  • Ensure your composition stays exactly the same throughout. As you can’t use a tripod, you will have to concentrate on staying very still.
  • Import these images into Photoshop. You’ll need to make sure the photos are all aligned. Layer the photos on top of each other, then go to Edit>Auto-Align Layers.
  • Now select all the images again. Next go to Files>Script>Statistics. From the menu that appears choose the median option. This will remove non-stationary object from your image, in theory leaving you with an image containing no people.
  • It’s possible you will have some areas of the image that either still contain people, or a blurry area where people moved. Should this be the case you’ll need to clone out the areas of concern, but these should be small after using the automated script.

Best time to visit – Arrive early to avoid waiting several hours in a queue.

Rome is fun to walk about, but there’s an excellent tram system that will get you around a little quicker if you want to spend time lingering elsewhere.

New Doors

 

Birthdays are good for you.

Statistics show that the people who have the most

live the longest.

Larry Lorenzoni

 

A very Happy Birthday to this Powerful Goddess of many talents and to all of us, summer beauties, as we welcome another year of opening doors for possibility, adventure, or simply enjoy the pleasure of seeing what’s always been in front of us with new eyes!

Excerpt from That Which You Are Seeking is Causing You to Seek by Cheri Huber:

Letting go allows us to see that we are never in control in the first place.  “Do you really mean that I have no control over my life?”  Not in the sense that we usually mean it.  You can write the script, but you’ll need a lot of cooperation for the play to go the way you’ve written it.  That’s a lot to expect, especially when you consider that everyone else has a script that doesn’t read anything like yours.

You can make plans, you can make decisions, you can make choices, but there’s no guarantee that things will go the way you expect or want them to.  When you can see that, when you can act without attachment  to the outcome, you are acting from the center that knows it does not control life, even as it knows it is life itself.

Letting go is releasing our grip on delusion, allowing us to see what is.  When we stop resisting what is, when we stop clinging to our beliefs and assumptions about how things should be, we open ourselves to the present moment.  Letting go goes hand in hand with acceptance.  One does not happen without the other.  Letting go is opening the hand.  Acceptance is what the open hand receives.

Click on “Leave a Comment” (top left) to share how you welcome a new day and an exciting new year!

xoxox

xoxox

Give the women you love the most unique gift

of elegant and timeless portraits with a

Powerful Goddess Gift Certificate

for a most memorable two hour photo shoot of up to three people!

 

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© Sharon Birke

Managing Member, DoubleSmart LLC

201 697 1947

Sharon@PowerfulGoddess.com

www.PowerfulGoddess.com

Glamour Portraits of the Goddess in Every Woman

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Empty Next

 

Make the most of yourself,

for that is all there is

of you.

Ralph Waldo Emerson

This graduation season has been a sentimental milestone for me.  It closes a chapter in life that leaves my husband and me standing exposed as individuals who have been immersed as committed parents for the last couple of decades. It kind of feels like a breakup with the house all quiet, one less plate to set at meal time, no more mountains of laundry or mess in the kitchen. Thankfully, these wise beauties share their recipes for getting over it–sometimes slowly but surely:

You need to cook that beautiful dinner even when it’s just you, wear your favorite outfit, buy yourself some flowers, and celebrate the self love that often gets muddled when we focus on what we don’t have. -Meghan Markle

Time passes, and the more you live your life and create new habits, you get used to not having a text message every morning saying, ‘Hello, beautiful. Good morning.’ You get used to not calling someone at night to tell them how your day was. You replace these old habits with new habits, like texting your friends in a group chat all day and planning fun dinner parties and going out on adventures with your girlfriends, and then all of a sudden one day you’re in London and you realize you’ve been in the same place as your ex for two weeks and you’re fine. And you hope he’s fine. -Taylor Swift

There are two ways you can go: You can either nurture yourself or go destructive. I have gone down the destructive path before, and that didn’t work for me. You dig deep beyond those scars and find that soft tissue again, and you massage and nurture it and bring it to life, little by little, through serving yourself well. I did it through hikes and vitamins and therapy and prayer and good friends. -Katy Perry

I actually shed tears for the woman I used to be. How sad was I in my ‘please’ and ‘you don’t understand, just give me another chance’ and all that stuff. What I now know is that was my biggest teacher. He was here to show me to myself so I could learn to love myself more. This was the guy who said to me, ‘The problem with you is you think you special.’ And I said, ‘No I’m not. No, I’m not really special.’ Look at me now. -Oprah Winfrey

Heartbreak is a gift in itself. Cry if you have to, but it won’t be forever! You will find love again, and it will be even more beautiful! In the meantime enjoy all that YOU are! -Rihanna

There are many stages of grief. It’s sad, something coming to an end. It cracks you open. When you try to avoid the pain, it creates greater pain. I’m a human being, having a human experience in front of the world. I try really hard to rise above it. -Jennifer Aniston

Click on “Leave a Comment” (top left) on how you’d fill an empty nest.

All images on this page are from Google.

xoxox

Give the women you love the most unique gift

of elegant and timeless portraits with a

Powerful Goddess Gift Certificate

for a most memorable two hour photo shoot of up to three people!

 

Buy Now Button with Credit Cards

© Sharon Birke

Managing Member, DoubleSmart LLC

201 697 1947

Sharon@PowerfulGoddess.com

www.PowerfulGoddess.com

Glamour Portraits of the Goddess in Every Woman

 

 

 

 

 

 

Fathers On Love

 

Learn from other people’s mistakes.

We will never live long enough

to make them all on our own.

from “Human Engineering” by Harry Myers and Mason M. Roberts

 

Happy Father’s Day!  Llittle Daddy’s girls grow up too quickly into gorgeous women!  What life experience would you pass on to our daughters as wisdom on men and relationships?

Prince Charming is not coming.  Do you really want to get involved with a dashing self-absorbed Mama’s boy who’s obsessed with slaying dragons and chasing damsels in distress?  This can only mean he’s unemployed and is on serious medication to believe dragons exist. You won’t be the first nor last damsel in distress he’ll want to rescue and his thirst for constant adventure won’t make him a happy helper with the kids at home. There is a price to pay for everything so clarify the manly qualities that are most important to you, as well as your deal breakers.

Handle your own money. Set up your bank accounts so an automatic percentage for every dollar you earn goes to a savings account that grows.  No matter how attractive credit card companies make the terms of their little plastics, do not spend more than what you have.  Most importantly, avoid marrying other people’s debts and drama.

Be happy alone. Whether in a relationship or not, keep time alone sacred and romance yourself each week to enjoy your own company. Even when demanding children start popping into the scene, your primary relationship should always be with yourself.

Great sex ain’t good enough.  A relationship needs conversation, laughter and shared values to make it through tough times. Before those sex hormones cloud your thinking–making you obsessive and attached–establish ties that bind common interests outside the bedroom.

Actions speak louder.  Falling in love is delusional. When we’re interested in someone, we will interpret other people’s words to skew for intent. If his actions don’t back up what he says, learn from Ariana Grande: Next!

Something is not always better than nothing.  How does he make your life better? If you know he’s not good enough, but he’s the only one who has asked you out in awhile, don’t waste your time nor his. Both of you are better off asking other people out whom you may be better matched. Don’t be lazy.

Keep your relationships rich and varied. Many women brush off girlfriends in the thrill of being a couple.  Rookie mistake!  Maintain breathing room to acknowledge your individuality and he will appreciate your confidence in giving him time to himself and to hang with his boys. Value each other’s disparate experiences and influences that you bring to the table. At the very least, make sure you like his friends and family because you’ll be spending time a lot of time with them, too.

Your sad story is boring. Whatever and whoever shows up in our lives are meant to draw out qualities like wisdom, strength and courage. Find the gift of a breakup, never abandon yourself, and move forward in life with greater self-compassion and understanding. There is never a wasted experience and there is no dignity in being identified as victim forever.

Click on “Leave a Comment” (top left) to share wisdom from your dad or your own, if you’re a dad yourself. You’re too lucky to be loved by many divine Goddesses!

xoxox

 

 

 

 

 

xoxox

Give the women you love the most unique gift

of elegant and timeless portraits with a

Powerful Goddess Gift Certificate

for a most memorable two hour photo shoot of up to three people!

 

Buy Now Button with Credit Cards

© Sharon Birke

Managing Member, DoubleSmart LLC

201 697 1947

PowerfulGoddess@me.com

www.PowerfulGoddess.com

Glamour Portraits of the Goddess in Every Woman

 

 

 

 

 

 

Irving’s Woman

 

Clothes make the man.

Naked people have little or

no influence on society.

Mark Twain

 

Irving Penn and Lisa Fonssagrives

 

The month’s iconic birthday boy is Irving Penn, born June 16, 1917.  He spent 66 of his 92 years at Vogue, creating an unprecedented 165 covers—more than any other photographer in its history.  He is remembered for luminous couture compositions shot in natural light as much as his portraits that seemed to reveal hidden selves of sitters from famous celebrities, indigenous folks and people next door, to local tradesmen. For his iconic backdrops, he worked with a discarded theatrical curtain in the studio and random scenes around the streets of Paris.

It was at Vogue’s historic shoot of the Twelve Beauties, the first group portrait of the popular models of the era, that he met the fabulous woman considered to be the original supermodel who eventually became his wife and muse for 42 years, Lisa Fonssagrives. How can a woman resist a man who chooses her over several other lovelies?

What is most remarkable about this artist famous for his fashion portraits is that he didn’t even like fashion. He wanted to be a painter but when that didn’t pan out, his friend hired him to work at Vogue’s art department. When the reigning Vogue photographers of the time could not deliver the modern look that he sought to give the magazine a fresh look for the next generation of women, he picked up the camera himself, diligently applying his technical and artistic skills to successfully deliver his aesthetic. Aside from paid assignments, he constantly pursued his own personal projects shooting flowers, still life, etc. This is an essential practice to consider when we feel stuck and uninspired. Very useful, too, for those who are confused and made lame by the pandering philosophy of “follow your passion” when there’s no obvious passion in plain sight.

Click on “Leave a Comment” (top left) to share how you keep your heart’s fire burning.

xoxox

All photos on this page are from Google Images.

Twelve Beauties, Vogue 1947

 

Give the women you love the most unique gift

of elegant and timeless portraits with a

Powerful Goddess Gift Certificate

for a most memorable two hour photo shoot of up to three people!

Buy Now Button with Credit Cards

© Sharon Birke

Managing Member, DoubleSmart LLC

201 697 1947

PowerfulGoddess@me.com

www.PowerfulGoddess.com

Glamour Portraits of the Goddess in Every Woman

 

 

 

 

 

 

Bride and Prejudice

 

Marriage is the triumph of imagination over intelligence.

A second marriage is the triumph

of hope over experience.

Oscar Wilde

 

 

Here come the brides in June! Americans are still married to monogamy even as online dating provides ever widening options to make exploring our curiosities outside it easier. In 2016, a survey found that 48 percent of men and 31 percent of women said that their ideal relationship would be nonexclusive to some degree. Esther Perel‘s TED talk Rethinking Infidelity has racked up 7.5 million views on Youtube, making someone who preaches forgiveness a star.

As modern as we would like to believe our society to be, the stigma on affairs still provides prime fodder for tabloids and personal choices continue to cast a long shadow on professional lives.  Why do we feel entitled to judge other people’s (sex) lives and choices–as if we can know what they’re going through, as if we’ll ever have the chance to walk in their shoes?

Recognizing our innate desire to duplicate the devotion of parental love in our spouse, would you be capable of prioritizing your primary relationship if you were allowed adventures outside the marriage?  Would you rather have shallow relationships with many partners or do you want the pleasure of the long game and a shared history in getting to know someone deeply and profoundly? However you choose to make up your mind along the way, how can we remember that marriage is different for each participant? Because to speak frankly, what came first: marriage and monogamy or our very human nature that continually seeks novelty and variety?

More than separate checking accounts or the option to sleep in separate beds, the biggest challenge of a long term relationship is our tendency to believe we own our spouse even as we take them for granted. Relationship takes work and plenty of tending, an often tested commitment to see the best in the other while requiring us to dig deep into our ability to provide a safe space for each to grow in whatever way he/she requires as an evolving soul.

Everyone else outside such relationship must have more important things to do like mind their own business.

Click on “Leave a Comment” (top left) to share what marriage means to you.

xoxox

 

 

Give the women you love the most unique gift

of elegant and timeless portraits with a

Powerful Goddess Gift Certificate

for a most memorable two hour photo shoot of up to three people!

 

Buy Now Button with Credit Cards

© Sharon Birke

Managing Member, DoubleSmart LLC

201 697 1947

PowerfulGoddess@me.com

www.PowerfulGoddess.com

Glamour Portraits of the Goddess in Every Woman

 

 

 

 

 

 

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