Powerful Goddess Portraits

Glamour Portraits of the Goddess in Every Wife & Mother

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The Flirt and The Fan

03 Oct 2013 2 Comments

by Powerful Goddess Portraits by Sharon Birke of DoubleSmart LLC in Best Books for Women, Best Movies for Women, Boudoir Photography, Glamour Portraits Tags: Best Movies for Women, Oscar Wilde books, Secret Language of the Fan

There are times not to flirt.

When you’re sick. When you’re with children.

When you’re on the witness stand.
Joyce Jillson

Is the art of flirting only for the young and single? What if you’ve been married too long and it’s too late to consult the Victorian guidelines for finding the perfect mate, e.g., “avoid a person with the same eye color as yourself, marry someone who is your opposite in physical and mental characteristics, choose a man with straight or thicker hair if your hair was curly or thin”?

A worldly older woman explains to a young husband the secret language of the fan in the 2004 movie “A Good Woman” (based on the 1892 play Lady Windermere’s Fan by Oscar Wilde.) How fun is it to communicate with your darling even when you’re at opposite corners of a party room? Handy, too, when you don’t want the kids to understand what’s being said across the dinner table.

A closed fan touched to the right eye: “When may I see you?”
Letting the fan rest on the right cheek: “Yes.”
Letting the fan rest on the left cheek:  “No.”
Fan held over left ear: “I wish to get rid of you.”
Covering the left ear with an open fan: “Do not betray our secret.”
Fan opened wide: “Wait for me.”
Touching the finger to the tip of the fan:  “I wish to speak with you.”
Half-opened fan pressed to the lips: “You may kiss me.”
Putting the fan handle to the lips: “Kiss me.”
Resting the fan on her lips: “I don’t trust you.”
Opening and closing the fan rapidly: “You are cruel”
Quickly and impetuously closing the fan: “I’m jealous.”
Drawing the fan through the hand: “I hate you!”
Hands clasped together holding an open fan: “Forgive me.”
Hiding the eyes behind an open fan:  “I love you.”
Hitting the palm of your hand: “Love me.”
Hitting any object: “I’m impatient.”
Dropping the fan: “I belong to you.”
Twirling the fan in the left hand: “We are being watched.”
Passing the fan from hand to hand: “I see that you are looking at another woman.”

Click on “Leave a Comment” (above left) to share a language you speak only with your man.

xoxox

your man.

xoxox

201 697 1947

Glamour Portraits of the Goddess in Every Wife & Mother

Thank you for your response. ✨

xoxox

Goodbye, Summer!

02 Sep 2013 1 Comment

by Powerful Goddess Portraits by Sharon Birke of DoubleSmart LLC in Best Books for Women, Boudoir Photography, Glamour Portraits Tags: Bikini Season, I Feel Bad About My Neck book, Nora Ephron Humor

In the depth of winter,

I learned that there was in me

an invincible summer.

Albert Camus

Another summer ends and those of us who have been holding in our tummies throughout bikini season can finally exhale with relief–not only because the kids will be back in school soon! 😉

The late humorist Nora Ephron griped about aging in I Feel Bad About My Neck:

There are all sorts of books written for older women. They are uniformly upbeat and full of bromides and homilies about how pleasant life can be once one is free from all the nagging obligations of children, monthly periods, and in some cases, full-time jobs. I find these books utterly useless, just as I found all the books I once read about menopause utterly useless. Why do people write books that say it’s better to be older than to be younger? It’s not better. Plus, you can’t wear a bikini. Oh, how I regret not having worn a bikini for the entire year I was twenty-six. If anyone young is reading this, go, right this minute, put on a bikini, and don’t take it off until you’re thirty-four.

Click on “Leave a Comment” (above left) to share what you may regret (twenty years from now) not appreciating today.

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201 697 1947

Glamour Portraits of the Goddess in Every Wife & Mother

by Powerful Goddess Portraits by Sharon Birke of DoubleSmart LLC in Best Books for Women, Boudoir Photography, Glamour Portraits Tags: Self-care and Intimacy, Too Good For Her Own Good Claudia Bepko & Jo-Ann Krestan, Women's Empowerment Book

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xoxox

Too Good for Her Own Good

05 Aug 2013 4 Comments

Between two evils,

I always choose the one I haven’t tried before.

Mae West

An excerpt from Too Good for Her Own Good by Claudia Bepko and Jo-ann Krestan:

Our fantasies are guides to our real selves. And unless we’re acting on the basis of those fantasies, chances are we’re not taking appropriate responsibility for ourselves. Unless we allow our dreams and passions to emerge, shaped by the realistic limits of our lives, we numb ourselves by being too responsible, too much a serious adult. In this state we usually become focused on acting in a parental way toward everyone else. Instead of following our dreams, we take responsibility for theirs. We feel frustrated and stuck as a result.

Many women avoid making changes or decisions because they feel they can’t bring themselves to hurt someone else. Hurting others is a reality of real relationships. We can’t be wholly involved and engaged with another person without sometimes hurting them because inevitably two people’s needs and impulses are different and conflict.

The bottom line is that unless we feel that the decisions we make are based on values that we’ve defined for ourselves, unless we feel we’re truly being responsive to our own needs and wants, our relationships are likely to suffer anyway. They’ll suffer from the underlying anger and resentment that we feel because we’re not pursuing our own goals. We can’t be genuinely responsive to others unless we’re responsible to ourselves first.

Click on “Leave a Comment” (above left) to share how you’ve been good to yourself. Happy August!

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201 697 1947

Glamour Portraits of the Goddess in Every Wife & Mother

by Powerful Goddess Portraits by Sharon Birke of DoubleSmart LLC in Best Books for Women, Boudoir Photography, Glamour Portraits Tags: Kiss Me First by Lottie Mogach, The Affairs of Others by Amy Grace Lloyd, The Color Master by Amy Bender

Thank you for your response. ✨

Summer Reads

17 Jul 2013 3 Comments

When I read about the evils of drinking,

I gave up reading.

Henry Youngman

I’m curious to see what book’s in your beach bag! Click on “Leave a Comment” (left) to add to this reading list for long days and hot summer nights, preferably in an air-conditioned haven for me. Happy Summer! xoxox

Kiss Me First

by Lottie Mogach.

A web of sex and identity theft entangles a solitary young woman online.

The Affairs of Others

by Amy Grace Lloyd.

A widow rediscovers passion and possibility in the knotty/naughty lives of her building tenants.

Necessary Errors

by Caleb Crain

Imagine living in Prague and starting anew.

The People in the Trees

by Hanya Yanigahara.

Set in Micronesia, a doctor discovers the Fountain of Youth and other dangerous ideas when cultures collide.

Ava Gardner: The Secret Conversations

with Peter Evans.

Conversations so real they could only be published way after her death.

Thank you for your response. ✨

xoxox

For the Love of Luxury

12 Jun 2013 2 Comments

by Powerful Goddess Portraits by Sharon Birke of DoubleSmart LLC in Best Books for Women, Glamour Portraits, Money and Abundance Tags: Luxury Cars, The Artist's Way by Julia Cameron, Women and Money

Men like cars,

women like clothes.

I like cars because they take me to clothes.

Rita Rudner

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Father’s Day is a good day as any to pick up a lesson or two from men and their more relaxed attitude towards luxury and money. Following is an excerpt from Julia Cameron’s book “The Artist’s Way” on the importance of pampering–and when she speaks of art and creativity, I think of life itself.

For those of us who yearn to be creative and refuse to feed that hunger in ourselves so that we become more and more focused on our deprivation–a little authentic luxury can go a long way. The key word here is authentic. Because art is born in expansion, in a belief in sufficient supply, it is critical that we pamper ourselves for the sense of abundance it brings to us.

Luxury is very often a shift in consciousness more than flow–although as we acknowledge and invite what feels luxurious to us, we may indeed trigger an increased flow. Creative living requires the luxury of time and space for ourselves and pampering can take many forms. For Gillian, a pair of new-to-her tweed trousers from the vintage store conjured images of Carole Lombard laughter and racy roadsters. For Jean, a single sprightly Gerber daisy perched on her night table told her life was abloom with possibility. Constance found luxury in allowing herself the indulgence of a magazine subscription. For Kathy, it is a deluxe Crayola set, “the kind my mother would never get me.” For Berenice, the answer is fresh raspberries. (And there’s fun, too, in taking luxury literally like this Powerful Goddess here!)

All too often, we become blocked and blame it on our lack of money. This is never an authentic block. The actual block is our feeling of constriction, our sense of powerlessness. Art requires us to empower ourselves with choice. At the most basic level, this means choosing to do self-care… Forget high minded aspirations. What sounds like fun?

Click on “Leave a Comment” (above left) to share your favorite indulgence. Have many luxurious days long after Father’s Day!

xoxox

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xoxox

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201 697 1947

Glamour Portraits of the Goddess in Every Wife & Mother

by Powerful Goddess Portraits by Sharon Birke of DoubleSmart LLC in Best Books for Women, Glamour Portraits, Unique and Personalized Gift Ideas Tags: Deepak Chopra Book of Secrets, Personalized Mother's Day Gift, unique Mother's Day gifts

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xoxox

Secret Garden

08 May 2013 2 Comments

My mother buried three husbands,

and two of them were only napping.

Rita Rudner

I love Spring! Each bloom and bud a reminder that I, too, know instinctively how to grow, that there is wisdom in being patient with my own seasons, that I can choose to move towards the light with no time to waste worrying whether my petals are too big or if I’m the best bloom in the garden.

From Deepak Chopra’s classic The Book of Secrets:

It is very freeing to know that on some dimension or other, every event in life can be causing only one of two things: Either it is good for you, or it is bringing up what you need to look at in order to create good for you. There is no right or wrong, only a series of possibilities.

Evolution is win-win. Cause and effect aren’t just linked, they are linked in the most efficient way possible. Many good things come from bad decisions while many bad ones are tangled up in our good decisions. Life is self-correcting in just this way. As the choice-maker you can act on a whim; you can follow arbitrary or irrational paths. But the underlying machinery of consciousness doesn’t alter. It keeps following the same principles, which are:

To adapt to your desires

To make you aware of what you are doing

To show you the consequences of your action

To keep everything in balance and harmony

Click on “Leave a Comment” (above left) to share how you’ll bring yourself flowers on Mother’s Day! xoxox

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201 697 1947

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Glamour Portraits of the Goddess in Every Wife & Mother

by Powerful Goddess Portraits by Sharon Birke of DoubleSmart LLC in Best Books for Women, Boudoir Photography, Glamour Portraits Tags: Coming to Our Senses book by Jon Kabat Zinn, Curvy Women Boudoir Portraits, Marian Keyes high heels funny quote

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The Origin of Shoes

25 Apr 2013 Leave a comment

My shoes are so high that when I step out of them

people ask “Where did she go?”

and I have to say, “I’m down here.”

Marian Keyes

Before Manolo Blahnik, Christian Louboutin, or Jimmy Choo, here is an ancient story of how shoes came to be invented from Coming to Our Senses by Jon Kabat Zinn:

Once upon a time, a princess took a walk and stubbed her toe on a root sticking out in her path. Vexed, she went to the prime minister and insisted that he draw up an edict declaring that the entire kingdom should be paved in leather so no one would ever have to suffer her pain. Now the prime minister knew that the king always wanted to please his daughter in any and every way, so there was a good chance he would actually want to fulfill his daughter’s wishes. Covering the kingdom in leather might save everybody from the indignity of stubbed toes and make the princess happy, but this could also be problematic in many ways, to say nothing of expensive.

Thinking quickly (I won’t say “on his feet”), the prime ministers responded: “I have it! Instead of covering the whole kingdom in leather, Your Highness, why don’t we craft pieces of leather shaped to your feet and attach them in some suitable way? Then, we will still enjoy the sweetness of the earth, yet wherever you go, your feet will be protected when it touches the ground.” The princess was well pleased so shoes came into the world and much folly was averted.

Click on “Leave a Comment” above left to share how shoes and possibility thinking have saved you.

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Feminine Mystique in History

21 Mar 2013 2 Comments

by Powerful Goddess Portraits by Sharon Birke of DoubleSmart LLC in Best Books for Women, Glamour Portraits, Women's Empowerment Tags: Feminine Mystique by Betty Friedan, Women and Money, Women's History Month

I have a brain and a uterus

and I use both.

Patricia Schroeder

“I’m the best cook and baker. I love to clean the kitchen and do the laundry. My husband will be so lucky!” My daughter beams. I squelch the “Yikes!” I feel inside and smooth the wrinkle between my eyebrows. My mom once sported a chic bob with a thriving banking career that helped send 5 children to college. Now she looks like a farmer’s wife with hair as long as the skirt ordained by the fundamentalist religion my dad has adopted since they retired. How innumerable have a woman’s choices grown since the days of illiteracy and candlelight? How few do we consider possible for ourselves anyway? And how strong is our need to tell others what we believe is right for them? All for their own good, of course!

To bring to a close Women’s History Month, I thought I’d pick up on a conversation Betty Friedan started half a century ago in her book “The Feminine Mystique”–which remains relevant despite certain biases in perspective. Staying home has become an option even for men. Women can choose to be single, childless, work, pay someone to have or raise her kids. We may make our own money yet our financial independence remains hostage to the sway of media and commerce that thrive on feeding our fears and insecurities. As for personal fulfillment, who really wants to be that responsible? It’s far more convenient to blame someone or something else for the choices we (don’t) make. So the mystery continues…

Click on “Leave a Comment” (above left) to give a big hug to the teacher or advocate who ignited your power to choose and write your own history.

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by Powerful Goddess Portraits by Sharon Birke of DoubleSmart LLC in Best Books for Women, Boudoir Photography, Glamour Portraits Tags: Clarissa Pinkola Estes, unique & personalized Valentine gifts, Women Who Run With the Wolves book

Glamour Portraits of the Goddess in Every Wife & Mother

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The Valentine Key

14 Feb 2013 4 Comments

If I’d followed all the rules,

I’d never have gotten anywhere.

Marilyn Monroe

My daughter dressed herself in pink from head to toe today, so excited to give her handwritten Valentine cards to 18 classmates, a couple of teachers, and a dozen more friends after school. I asked, “And did you make yourself a Valentine, too?” She looked away probably wondering “What for?!”

The tale of Bluebeard in Clarissa Pinkola Estes’ “Women Who Run With the Wolves” tells of a sinister figure who marries a young girl–who else can sinister figures con? 😉 Before going away on a trip, he leaves her the keys to his castle but forbids her from opening a particular door. Of course, she had to get curious. Only clear thinking with some help from her siblings saves her from his wrath and certain death.

Bluebeard is that voice constantly diminishing our creativity and power, insisting we are never enough, making us feel selfish when we choose to do what we want for ourselves. Bluebeard forbids the use of the key to self awareness because it paves the path to personal freedom. Relinquishing our natural instincts in order to appease and please others, laying aside our dreams and desires, settling for less is the carnage that lie behind that forbidden door.

For a Valentine to touch the heart (and ovaries,) answer Clarissa’s four questions about doors we are not supposed to open and rules we are not supposed to question:

1. What stands behind?

2. What is not as it appears?

3. What do I know deep in my ovaries that I wish I did not know?

4. What of me has been killed or lays dying?

Click on “Leave a Comment” (above left) to share forbidden doors you’ve opened or wish you could. xoxox

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Glamour Portraits of the Goddess in Every Wife & Mother

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Painting Possibilities

04 Jan 2012 4 Comments

by Powerful Goddess Portraits by Sharon Birke of DoubleSmart LLC in Best Books for Women, Boudoir Photography, Glamour Portraits Tags: Barbara Sher books, self-care, women's empowerment

Don’t ask what the world needs.

Ask what makes you come alive

and go do it.

Because what the world needs

are people who have come alive.

Howard Thurman

Aaah, the New Year, a clean slate, a blank canvas… How do the messy details trailing us from the past clarify what to strive for as we look ahead? And the beckoning possibilities are innumerable! What will you choose for yourself this year, O Powerful Goddess? Whom will you reach out to? What freedoms will you relish? What will you want to learn or continue to ignore? What will you choose to do with your time and talents? How much value will you give your “small” successes and pleasures? How can you remember to care for yourself, listen to your inner wisdom and feed your peace even as the world demands you do, do, do and give, give, give to others first?

Barbara Sher is one of my favorite author of self-help classics like I Could Do Anything If I Only Knew What It Was and It’s Only Too Late If You Don’t Start Now. This loving and no-nonsense woman has been a bright guiding light in my journey of coming home to myself, insisting I dance to the beat of my own drum and honor my genius–however many. 😉 Her latest book Refuse to Choose is an invitation to create and define our own fulfillment based on what feels right for us. What could happen when we pay closer attention to our joy and trust it as The Guru that knows how to make the most of our talents, learning abilities and work style? That in feeding our happiness (without beating ourselves up if we don’t make a million dollars off it) we uplift and inspire others to do the same? That there is no such thing as mistakes or failure in the lifelong adventure of exploration?

What will you paint on your 2012 canvas

that feels right for you?

A very thrilling beginning and Happy New Possibilities to us all!

xoxox

Sharky

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